Tarde al la escuela , y el hijo , se quedó

Tarde al la escuela , y el hijo , se quedó con la maestra.Entonces ya eran las 20:35 y la madre , se enbobó al ver al niño. Despues de un par de semanas , llamaron a la mama.

porque to mama tiene olor como pescados viejos.

As I replied very politely:"Nao mete a mae no meio que eu meto no meio da tua,aquela puta!"He didn't really undestand what I said word by word,but he got the idea.I walked out and

thought of other ways I could put my Portuguese skills to good practice in this hillbilly town. I went to my mother in law and told her "A tua cara faz-me vomitar, velha bruxa"

My in-law put down her corncob pipe and tooked at me. "You said, A tuna car fez my vomiter, Valhala Boxer? Make sense man!" Unfortunately papa-in-law was from Brazil and understood

that an authentic Valhalla Boxer would be too busy Valhalla Boxing to know about the tuna cars or the fezzed vomiters. He accused me of lying, so I

showed him a photo of his wife fornicating with a drunk haberdasher in the back of a tuna delivery van. I took no pleasure in it for it clearly broke him. It was a hard

picture to procure, as conditions had to be just right to capture that peculiar set of circumstances. He collapsed to the floor, sobbing, and asked me,

"What happened to your mustache?"

"The barber was expensive but I snagged and broke the razor on the sides. My voice has been real hoarse unless I shout, and I have this bad nervous twitch in my shoulder and arm."