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Hey, kids it's me, I bet you thought that

  • Hey, kids it's me, I bet you thought that I was dead! But when I fell over I just broke my leg and got a hemorrhage in my head! Ha-ha-ha!
  • Woo-boy! the funeral you had for me was great! Who made those ham salad sandwiches? Delish! And the look on your face when I popped out? Absolutely priceless!
  • Har-HAR! And then when I announced in front of EVERYONE that, in fact, you "murdered" me for my life insurance! Boy, was your face red! I was on to you the whole time, you know.
  • You're not named as a beneficiary.You're not even in my will. When I finally DO die, you won't get one red cent outta me, no sirree-bob! Do you even know WHY I hate you so much?!
  • Well, I'll tell ya! Remember when you were going to PigglyWiggly? and I asked you to get me that football helmet filled with SnacPac pudding? You never got it for me! Why should u
  • ncle Louie come to our party now?! You know his rabid parrot will only eat tapioca pudding from football helmets. Fuck, there goes another family Thanksgiving dinner. May as wel
  • l put on the dog and accept this crappy Thanksgiving. Aunt Ginger was drunk when she showed up, someone left the gut bag in the turkey and Uncle Louie's racist rabid parrot
  • So they called Dr. Dog. Dr. Dog and Det. Manatee showed up together. Their utility bags came from a store that didn't want to sell them at half price at my request. They wept when
  • the 3,503,234th pieces were missing from both their bags. Dr. Dog smelled a crook and Det. Manatee suspected Shark Lady was the culprit, the Red Herring queen!
  • But turned out Det. Manatee was wrong about Shark Lady. A break in the case! In mysteries such as this, it turns out that the dirty deed was always done by the polar bear butler.
Started
2013-12-02 10:48:03
Finished
2016-08-15 01:16:13

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