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Let me just start by saying it's not my fault.

  • Let me just start by saying it's not my fault. That dog shouldn't have been there in the first place. And who ordered the chinese food anyway? If you think that I'm going to
  • take the fall for this, you're nuts. I put the phone by the dogs paw and the Chinese food in it's bowl, wiped my fingerprints, then eased out into the hall. Outside, sirens
  • were blowing and I had to run for my life and hide so they could not find me. I watched as the police went inside the house and I stopped and left afraid if I stayed longer
  • they would find my collection of "I Hate Cops" action figures I had stored under my bed. I had only bought them for their collectable value but they would get the wrong idea. I ran
  • my mouth like a kid from the streets but my life is really comfortable. The abuse I suffered was that life was TOO easy, that's why I hate cops, because inside I am a black
  • panther. Not the militant group, you understand, but the actual animal. A lithe panther stalking an urban jungle. Cops hate panthers, I hate cops. Simple logic really. But what I
  • , a panther, wanted, was to get the heck out of the city. It'd be fun to run around exploring empty infrastructure, but it's not empty. Humans everywhere. They taste of spam & are
  • always pointing their iphones at me. The panther decided to travel only under the cover of darkness. He would slink past the crowd at Denny's and threaten the rats when they tried
  • to blackmail him with pictures of him as a cub. They had embarrassing photos which could ruin his reputation, but he was the one with claws. Satisfied with his plan, he
  • went ahead & published the photos of himself, bare & with claws outstretched...a preemptive strategy he'd learned when he was an intern in DC. It was embearassing, but it worked.
Started
2011-04-28 19:40:37
Finished
2013-09-26 20:18:28

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    CrazyBananas Sep 27 2013 @ 07:10

    Have you heard of this new book? It's called "101 ways to wok your dog" (giggle giggle)

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