I couldn't keep my eyes off of the woman

I couldn't keep my eyes off of the woman sitting to my left. Stupidly hot, driving a 6 speed better than any man I had ever met in my life. Alas, everyone has a hamartia, and hers
was using words like "hamartia" & expecting me to know what she was talking about. Most of the time, I had no idea. I just liked to watch her lips as she said it: "Haaammmarrtia."
Her hamartia was falling for enunciation pervs like me. To us, all talk is dirty talk. "Hey, babe," I said, "how about you read me this phone book? Start at Amy Aaaberg and stop at
Donna Duvall. Because if you go past the "Ds" I get all wierd about names that start with E. She started reading the phone book, and looking back over her shoulder she noticed a
raven closeby. "Don't try anything." She was wary of vocabulary-deficient fowls who referenced classic literature. She continued reading from a phonebook void of E's, her phobia wo
uld be her undoing. She would need an Ear, Nose, Throat doctor in a very short time. Her phobic removal of the phonebooks E's would end in disaster. She would be a speechless rave
r in a loudly mute environment. Now, her worst fear was realized- the power gave out! With no E's in her phonebook, she dialled a plumber, who got electrocuted, & no EMT's, either!
The silence was deafening. She realised she needed to fix it herself. Four years later, she too was electrocuted. The ENTS visited the ruins of her mansion and rebuilt it from zero
point zero zero zero zero pure nothing. The insurance company paid for the whole thing. They even rebuilt the hidden rooms and the hidden dead things that didn't act dead. Now they
were telling me that my insurance premium had gone WAY up. So I faked my death, and left my bank accounts full of pure nothing. I replaced the dead things with insurance agents.

Started: 2014-06-16 13:55:27
Finished: 2018-02-01 13:12:55

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