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I sat, absentmindedly stirring my cereal

  • I sat, absentmindedly stirring my cereal with my spoon. Ripples moved across the surface of the milk, I stopped stirring and it kept rippling. The table was shaking, they were here
  • . The Cereal Killers. I didn't intend to conjure them up, but by the time I realized what I'd done, it was too late. They leapt from my bowl with a vengeance, sparing my life only
  • because it stayed crunchy in milk. The Cereal Killers looked at me and said, "You must have some Lucky Charms because we're letting you keep your life." They got their Kix by
  • blowing smoke with illegal Froot Loops and taking Cocoa Puffs. "Cheerio!" the Cereal Killers said, Honeycombing for Honey Smacks. Captain Crunch leered and said, "I can help you."
  • "I need someone who doesn't go soggy on me, a fortified fighter without scruples I'm willing to pay in Golden Nuggets for the job. Can you eliminate Sugar Bear?" Capt.Crunch nodded
  • in silence. "I'll cut the roof of his mouth up real good-like for ya". And so, the good Admiral Crunch set out to work that October, stuffing hundreds of apples with razor blades
  • and pouring strychnine into Pixy Stix. Strychnine was a better choice than cyanide (which is what most folks used) because its taste and smell were much more
  • Than Shark Lady could take. She had just pretended to open a jar of pickles, after the Pickle Lady told her she did it the wrong way. "You snap the lid open, don't you remember !"
  • Suddenly, it all came back to her: her first kiss, being chosen prom queen, MegaShark proposing with glorious sunset in the background... & how to snap open pickle jars. Shark Lady
  • finally remembered who Tombstone was, and what they did to her. She now had everything she needed to infiltrate their operation and finally get revenge for being turned into a spy.
Started
2014-06-24 11:42:00
Finished
2016-08-25 12:05:14

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Gdnknxprmnt Aug 25 2016 @ 12:08

    Little known fact, Capt. Crunch isn't a captain. He's a commander. He only wears three stripes, whereas a captain wears four.

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