The 2013 National Beard and Moustache Championships

The 2013 National Beard and Moustache Championships are a few months away, yet my pirate blackbeard needs work to win. Maybe I can get my parrot, Squawkers, to grow a goatee.
I saw this thing on TV that is supposed to grow your hair super quick, so I got some. I told Squawkers this is our year! I used the hair tonic on him, but it's not 4 feathers.Whoop
s. Maybe this is how God created the platypus? Poor Squawkers was now a mess of once-beautiful feathers and sprouts of human hair from the tonic. Perhaps the zoo could could
somehow capitalize on what was happening, a way to cover up mistakes & instead bring in more visitors. Thus, the Zoo Beard Competition was born. Squawkers the Parakeet grew a nice
goatee. A beautiful green goatee that all the lady parakeets loved. It amazed him how is love live began to change all because of the beard competition. The only problem was
keeping his lovebirds quiet. They couldn't help but repeat his bedtime commands ad infinitum around Squawkers's wife. One night, she found red plumage in his prize-winning beard
. O the agony of betrayal! She stopped eating, sleeping her waking thoughts and sleeping dreams were consumed with revenge. His wife while he was sleeping, cut off Squawkers beard!
First shocked by his wife's appearance, he realized he was courting himself in the mirror. Squawkers job as freak of nature 'The Bearded Womanakete' in the Guilded Circus was endan
gered by his own mirror image. Squawkers' doppelganger was just like him, only freakier, with enlarged caricatured versions of parrot secondary sex characteristics. For example,
two beaks meant twice the--well, I don't need to tell /you/. Nor do I need to ask you to use your imagination! I've seen what you do with parrots, but it's not our place to judge.

Started: 2013-03-05 10:32:46
Finished: 2013-03-12 01:12:18

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