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Phillip Perry and Ray Fitzgerald were teammates

  • Phillip Perry and Ray Fitzgerald were teammates on the hazelwood west basketball team
  • but more importantly, they were the best of friends. Phillip and Perry had played basketball together since they were slam dunking on the Fisher Price rim in Perry's basement back
  • when they where both good at basketball.
  • Now that they were not so good at basket ball they decided to try zumba instead. So they headed down to the local
  • gym and checked out all the ladies that were dancing.
  • When I put my glasses on, they weren't dancing ladies at all. They were all old men getting physical therapy.
  • The physical therapists were strapping young men in smocks & those funny white covered Birkenstocks. "Ack! I think I've herniated my bellybutton" I cried while writhing on the floo
  • ded basement landing. The physical therapist jumped down and straddled me, wrapping her hands around my neck and squeezing tightly. Obviously, that wasn't what I'd had in mind.
  • So I turned the tables. I removed her arms, pulled my 12 gauge shotgun out, and blasted her right in the chest. Kaboom! That'll teach you to try that again.
  • In fact, I decided to have a quiz to see if shotgun to the chest had been superior educational methodology. "Will you try this again?" I asked. No response. Tsk tsk. Square one.

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