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Since dying is not an option, Tom had to

  • Since dying is not an option, Tom had to come up with a cracking-fast way of making some some money. It is not like he has the smarts to sell dope or the grit to be a chef.
  • But he had the fingers of a concert pianist. If he could learn to play the piano and become a concert musician he could raise the money to pay off the Ruslov brothers before they
  • broke his fingers, in which case he wouldn't be able to play the piano, even if he learned, and he wouldn't make money to pay off the Ruslov Bros. The whole thing was a Catch 22
  • and that's why he took the only reasonable action and broke his own fingers himself. "Ha!" he exclaimed proudly. "That will show them!" And then he passed out from the pain and
  • sunk deep into a medically induced comma, which is the most serious type of grammatical condition. There he met his spirit animal, the paperclip guy from Microsoft Word. "You look
  • like you could use help returning to reality!" Clippy said. "Write your resume backwards 108 times, and you will return to your world with newfound wisdom!" He started to write,
  • emuser ruoy...emuser ruoy...emuser ruoy...This is stupid, Im not going to write that 105 more times, I dont see how its going to make me a single letter wiser
  • !" It was not until the end of the week that the answer became clear. He was standing beside the mirrored walls beside the elevators when he glanced over saw the words: your resume
  • Was never read. The Big Boss lied to you." He lost his sense of direction and ended up on the 25th floor. He meant to push the "24" button. There was no way out except the stairs.
  • He slowly trudged to the window and opened it realizing he had been bested. The wind poured in. He took one step onto the windowsill. Opened his arms wide...[Fade to black]

1 Comments

  1. pinky Aug 03 2017 @ 10:59

    Another of those odd stories where the first and last folds are inexplicably related

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