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The world was stunned to learn that, contrary

  • The world was stunned to learn that, contrary to conventional wisdom, the majority of vegetables were sentient, intelligent creatures, and that, in fact, vegetarians were
  • mindless murderers. But though stricken, vegetarians are quite considerate, and so for the sake of fair play they offered themselves as free-range comestibles on the SETI channels
  • commercials. Now I think it's time we discuss the Omnivores. I mean, what gives? Pick a side will you? Omnivores are so piggish and greedy. Do you have to eat every kind of food? W
  • -hy do you always try my entree? Order everything you piggy pig pig-faced pig! Look, I don't hate omnivores. It's just, you eat whatever you want and you're skinny. I'm a fat vegan
  • . YOU eat gallons of ice cream, but maintain your six-pack, while I nibble on celery &...LOOK at this! (grabbing dimpled thighs)...Are these the thighs of a vegan? My eyes bulged
  • like ripe tomatoes. "Chill bruh" he said while tossing another tub of the white stuff aside, "it's lactose free ice cream, bro." My eyes widened. "Whaaaat? Tell me all about it!"
  • I was lactose intolerant, which sucked. This stuff looked nasty but tasted pretty good. Amazing. Such is life when you cannot tolerate gluten or lactose. Whole Foods is a good
  • place to find overpriced nasty looking food, especially for self diagnosed lactose intolerant folks. Once I had some grayish green spaghetti made of spaghetti squash and
  • builder's putty with a sauce made out of hornet eyes there. It tasted horrible, but it was completely gluten free so I was happy to pay a lot and suffer the physical consequences.
  • It hardly bears repeating but I do not expect romance from a chainsaw but it is nice to know that it cares about my gastrointestinal health. So, get more fiber.
Started
2013-02-02 18:48:28
Finished
2016-10-11 22:56:27

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