"Blow out the candle and make a wish, granny!"

"Blow out the candle and make a wish, granny!" we said. Granny looked down at the single candle in the Tastykake Chocolate Junior with disdain. She made her wish. The house rumbled
and without another word the table began to lift slowly from the floor. The Tastykake seemed to take on a life of it's own as it
became the chocolate home of Susan Powter's soul. She'd been such a hypocrite in life, pushing a diet while secretly eating naughty snacks, that God forced her to live in a Tastyka
yak houseboat. She had to constantly row to stay afloat, while simultaneously watching others eat scrumptious meals, for all eternity. She struck a desperate deal with
Sisyphus, 2 weeks a year pushing boulders up the mountain for 2 weeks of the yak houseboat, but after one week watching yaks dine on eachother's scrumptious backsides, Sisyphus
slept in the corner, and considered the potential of walking into the mist, beyond the bait boxes and littered decks of his punishment. Balance, he thought, balance is
not one of my best traits. He could barely even walk and chew gum at the same time. He decided to take a step foward, but began to stumble. He noticed something shiny on the ground
and everything was ok
except for the giant green mutated hamster in the bathtub, but that wasn't really important right now. At least everyone was safe. Well, almost everyone, but the police didn't
know of the dangers of giant green hamster vomit... Radioactive, toxic, carcinogenic and mutagenic... You name it, it'd probably have that property. As you'd expect, they died.

Started: 2012-06-23 20:41:51
Finished: 2015-09-24 04:26:21

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