Noel's social status didn't change when he

  • Noel's social status didn't change when he became a zombie. Even the zombie packs shunned him. But a constant voice in his head said, "Go back - it's not your time." Noel thrashed
  • around with his conscience. Noel was a Trashcanarian before he was a zombie and felt guilty eating anything he didn't find in a dumpster. He tried to rationalize eating the UPS man
  • but was ultimately deterred by his freegan values. "Well" Noel stated matter of factly to UPS man, "If I'm not going to eat you, you may as well help me defeat the Starfish king
  • but the UPS man had other plans for Noel. He was a slippery, cunning UPS man. When he asked "What could brown do for you?" it always sounded dirty.
  • But Noel needed somebody. Just anybody. He was the kinda guy who knew what this lewd UPS man was up to breaking out the shorts, & he voluntarily fell for the seduction, hook, line,
  • and crinker. Crinker? His mind, distorted at the sight of the brown shorts, interrupted rational thought. Noel shook his head as he did his best to pull his gaze from the UPS m
  • ans shorts to the tablet. "Sir? Could you sign right here?" Noel was so crunked he wrote his phone number and "Call me". The UPS smirked and handed him the shipment of
  • Mice who translated his correspondence from russian into
  • Pig Latin. "Etterbay etgay ouryay uttbay ackbay eforebay orningmay." Nobody knew what that meant. Then Mr. Oslo said, "Opstay ountingcay ouryay ickenschay eforebay eythay atchhay!"
  • With a smug smile, he took a few steps forward and simultaneously punched the air. Nothing feels better than rising above the rest.


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