45

The gigantic turtle-being retreated to the

  • The gigantic turtle-being retreated to the sea and sought its final rest. It hesitated before its last utterance, seemingly tinged with regret. "It is a world of destroy." Dr. Ta
  • said."Yes, yes it is" Agreed the gigantic turtle-being."Well, enjoy the after-life giant turtle!" Said Dr. Ta who turned and walked back up the beach. "Little does he know" thought
  • the giant turtle, "that when near death, turtles are faster than humans." And it sprinted across the beach after the good doctor, snapping at his behind with its razor-sharp beak.
  • Then the doctor turned around and said, "wait, wait, I'm not THAT kind of doctor!" It was true, he was not a medical doctor, but in fact he had majored in time travel back in
  • the 80s when Aerosmith was at their greatest. In any case, his medical degree was a cover up for his time travel projects. Unfortunately, he was a bad liar and couldn't explain
  • why Joe Perry kept showing up at his proctology practice. Everyone thought he perhaps had inflamed hemorrhoids, but in reality, Joe wanted the doc to reverse time so he could
  • "walk this way x 8, hey diddle diddle got a blockage in the middle, and can't seem to pass what I had last night, so Doc take me back to the future with a few little sutures,
  • so I can remind my past self who went to the future to not have that cthulhu burrito,but now that I remember, I wasn't a very good listener. Worth a try, in any case.Let's go, Doc.
  • Doc Larpin steepled his fingers and grinned at me. Even with half of his face completely gone, he still had a winning smile. "Let's step into my parlor and discuss this little
  • problem of yours". Little did I know that the good doctor's plan was to remove my small foreskin, dry it, crush it into a powder, and sell it as an impotency medication in China.

2 Comments

  1. zxvasdf May 24 2015 @ 11:37

    Newly circumcised, and unawares of my foreskin's ultimate destination, I booked passage to China and visited a crowded market in search of impotency medication.

  2. Scribbly May 24 2015 @ 17:31

    I like those lyrics, Slim. :D I saw them twice in concert for Get a Grip and Nine Lives. Great show both times.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!