One upon a time there was a dog named bacon.

  • One upon a time there was a dog named bacon. And all that dog wanted was to eat bacon and more bacon. Bacon ate so much bacon that his owner feared that he was going to turn into a
  • Vegetarian after developing an allergy to bacon. But Bacon the dog kept on eating bacon. So one day his owner went to his shed to fetch
  • some bacon, slice it up and feed it to the dog, but he had forgotten the dog itself was named "Bacon" and by feeding exclusively on bacon had become bacon-like in shape and temper.
  • So he decided to change the dog's name to Kevin. Yeah, yeah, not that original, but it was a great way for him to pick up women. They'd squeal and say OH LOOK! A bacon-shaped dog!
  • They were almost right as Kevin was infact a pig, not a dog. It all started with a trip to the vet after discovering the animal on the side of the road, muddy and abused.
  • The vet attempted to tell the happy new pet owners that Kevin was actually a piglet and due for a growth spurt very soon. But the owners were too busy cooing at their new 'dog' to
  • listen. Two weeks later, they were surprised when their "dog" Kevin started rutting. He rutted the sofa. He rutted the refrigerator. But when Mrs. Clemens walked her potbellied pig
  • the dog was taken aback by his opponent. Mrs Clemens had no idea that she just messed with the mess. The dog had a plan to screw the piggy up. One morning he hid behind the door...
  • Pigs, being pigs, are always on the look out for the butcher's knife that is coming for them. So they have a heightened alertness as to who might be behind a door. As piggy approac
  • ched the door 3 soft knocks were heard. Piggy answered "Who's there?". The voice behind the door answered "Anne". "Anne who?" Piggy replied. It answered "An ant!". *Badum* *tsst*.


  1. LordVacuity Aug 23 2018 @ 21:39

    That will screw piggy up.

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