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"68% of people acquainted with you are beginning

  • "68% of people acquainted with you are beginning to realize that you are full of shit." croaked the alarm clock. Regina must have set the alarm to angst. Well, I'm feeling anxious
  • but then she realized she'd set the alarm for "serene self-possession." The terrible words came from her boyfriend Ted. She said, "68%? What's the margin of error you jerk?"
  • "The margin of error," Ted said coldly, "is the length of your left foot divided by..." She was about to poke him in the eye when she was seized by a bout of self-possession so
  • she grabbed his right foot -the one she had borrowed him last night, size 9 and rather chubby I may say- and started running desperately towards the bus station as he was
  • He was left there standing in the middle of the street. Passers-by were moving quickly around him and cars were waiting for the green light. The only thing he had in mind was her
  • great big knockers. The mere memory of them rendered him useless. He stepped off the curb. A bread truck sideswiped him, knocking him back to reality. He wondered if he would ever
  • see her (or them!) again. Such a FOOL! WHY, he wondered, bonking himself in the forehead, did he start that stupid, stupid argument? Flipping off the breadtruck driver, he resolved
  • to put that wretched angel down once and for all. The bread truck was rounding Chesapeake Curve at 4:32 in the morning. The devil revved his moped, and put his plan into action.
  • "Plan A" was the plan's name. The devil also had a subsidiary plan called "operation wombok" which was a detailed step by step for renaming "Plan A" to something more exciting.
  • The Devil put Hureshimodius in charge. He surveyed the damned with a clipboard & whip. Bela Lugosi suggested 'Plan 9 from Outer Space' and Ed Wood got a deal he couldn't refuse...
Started
2011-11-28 23:31:41
Finished
2014-03-06 20:18:27

2 Comments

  1. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Mar 06 2014 @ 20:22

    Hureshimodius is the devil of bureaucracy.
  2. Avatar

    Zetawilk Mar 06 2014 @ 22:17

    Titivillus is the demon of typographical erorrs.

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