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Throughout the entire universe, before anything

  • Throughout the entire universe, before anything even existed, there has been one question. This question: "How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck can chuck wood?"
  • The question reverberated through the primordial universe until it collided with the Goddess Rhea's labia.
  • Through the questionable encounter, doubt was conceived. Doubt begat frustration, and frustration gave birth to anger which bore destruction. The universe winked out again, but
  • left behind a pregnant silence full of bitter and malicious brooding, to which the absent and traitless void gave no notice. But when the universe came back, it came back with a
  • very optimistic point of view. Sure it might not be the most pretty universe or the smartest universe or even the universe with the Kesel Run, but it was a universe just the same.
  • It was just me and that universe in that void of nothing. I'd never believed in God, but now I knew that there was something, some consciousness controlling. The universe thought.
  • And thought. But finally the Universe said it couldn't think of anyone else there besides me, and asked me if I was, perhaps, God. This hadn't occurred to me before. Had I not
  • realised that tattooed upon my own knuckles were the initials G O D. With this realisation, I had had enough with the universe, and after eating it, I decided to
  • Have a jigger of sangria each night until the 4 liter jug was gone. I will buy more when it 's half full. The master of the universe would understand why I chose to drink jiggers.
  • I was destine to become the greatest sangria drunken master. I studied my Kung Fu & focused on holding my liqueur. I am now renown as sifu of all. Come learn from me. hic* zen.
Started
2014-11-08 07:09:35
Finished
2016-12-29 19:43:09

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Dec 30 2016 @ 05:11

    Very deep, deep, deep jigger.

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