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The world is spinning as I wake up to the

  • The world is spinning as I wake up to the sound of thunder. The dark colors swirl around the room in an epileptic mess as the lightning continues to strike. Where is my wife?
  • Her pillow wasn't even touched. In another strobe of the lightning, I see that the closet door is banging back and forth with a muffled thump. "Oh..," I thought, "It's back again."
  • It was his old "friend," the poltergeist, the spirit of the previous homeowner. This was the type of guy that would bang change in his pocket and overuse phrases like "WINNING."
  • But he was a poltergeist nonetheless, so he allowed his old supremely annoying "friend" to join the angry ghost club. What made him such a pest was that
  • his friend had low self-esteem. Nothing worse than a whining, insecure poltergeist. who was unable to make decisions about where to throw vases and whatnot. The other poltergeists
  • got into a huddle and found an inspirational quote for him. "You need a backbone, not a wishbone!" they screeched. "FFS, I'm a poltergeist... I'm incorporeal you bunch of idiots,"
  • Gregor of the Haunted PJs brightened. "How about: 'Knock it off -- just knock it off'?" then shrugged. "Hey, it's hard to come up with an inspirational quote for a poltergeist!" Ch
  • Allenged by the King and Queen of the Haunted PJs, I was determined to put my foot in the door and get the job I wanted at mcdonalds after applying eight times. Long overdue, mum
  • complained about carrying the child for four years now, having promised not to go into labor until I was employed. The King and Queen of the Haunted PJs kept me from being hired at
  • Washington DC's premiere sleep deprivation think tank and party store, Dreams R Us. Now I would have my child on the streets, destitute, like a Pauper of Normal PJs. Such is life.

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