Tonight is an excellent night for murder.

  • Tonight is an excellent night for murder. It's beautiful outside, crisp with the fall wind adding an edge to the world. And she will love it as I will-for her it will be
  • a double-edge sword. I will use my sword once across the back as I come from behind, then twice across the front as I exit. Ha -- "x" it. Honey, tonight is a night for murder.
  • But 'honey' didn't seem to know what I was talking about. Of course, 'Honey' is my stuffed dog, so he had no idea what I was talking about often. He stared at me blankly. "Yeah
  • I was definitely in need of a good shrink, or at least a stiff drink. What would happen if I visited the all-girls school after midnight? Ms. Baxter would
  • likely be asleep so I could do my best "Humbert Humbert" impression on the 4th floor. I had bribed the cafeteria women to slip the purple pills into the meatloaf to ease my
  • bowel movement. I couldn't afford to take a chance that I might be constipated. You see, the whole plan hinged on one critical moment. If I failed to
  • check to see if the food I injested was organic. It wasn't. Stupid me. Luckily for me, I didn't have constipation. Unfortunately, I was up all night long with
  • a terrible headache from the symphony my wife played to me on her banjo and kazoo. I couldn't have waited another minute to
  • Put me earbuds in, crank my iPod to maximum volume, listening to rave music and think about my college days and that one sweaty weekend I tested the waters on the other side with
  • the cute blond geeky chick. She was the kind of sweetness you could only find in bacon dark chocolate - something slightly evil covered in deliciousness. It was almost good enough.


Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!