58

"Mothra is coming," he thought to himself.

  • "Mothra is coming," he thought to himself. Somehow he knew. He put fresh water and food in the cat's bowls, and pulled out some work-clothes from a pile. He packed his lunch and
  • headed off to his lab at the University of General Ignorance. Prof. Boffin had been conducting a study on moths and Mothra. A flickering light bulb had shown
  • that moths are attracted to light. Nobody was interested. As if the world already knew that fact. He drank another bottle of scotch to drown the feelings of self-hate and tried
  • to create a new fact. "Did you know that I'm thinking about lunch?!" A crowd of truth seekers gathered around him. "Did you know I feel cold?" "No, I didn't know that!" said one.
  • He couldn't compete with Twatter, though. Twatter let people talk to vapid celebrities, like some disgusting cult of ignorance paying homage to overpaid egocentric LARPers. Revenge
  • is a spiral, and I was trapped inside. I'd spent two summers at the ren faire biding my time, getting in deep. My appetite for vengeance was matched only by
  • my desire to win the most coveted of all prizes at the Ren Faire: the Golden Codpiece. Perhaps I could gain revenge against my enemy AND win the Golden Codpiece, since we were both
  • not very well endowed the Golden Codpiece would go a long way in disguising our "short" comings. I simply HAS to win the contest, however, my nemesis
  • is an awesome break dancer. My nemesis was more interesting than me, better looking, and unlike me had a sense of humor. But I had black magic and could close off his throat
  • singing with just a withering glance. So I throat sang with gay abandon while my nemesis could only look on in frustration and that's how I got the girl. End. Of. Story.

1 Comments

  1. 49erFaithful Aug 23 2013 @ 16:49

    Huh. I'd never heard this story before.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!