Hello. It's me. Your computer. Let's have

  • Hello. It's me. Your computer. Let's have a little chat, shall we? You know how you're always sniveling and whining and mashing my keyboard when I slow down? Well why don't you try
  • looking at your disgusting face everyday and process high speed information. You plugged my monitor into my tower, then pointed it at your face. Your eyes look like melted Cadbury
  • Raisin Clusters on the portable AM radio I had as a boy, and your voice sounded squawky, like a drive-in theatre speaker. The monitor was silent, and my tower sounded okay, but
  • anyway, I had a big poster of a Trans-Am one wall and another poster of day-glo mushrooms.' The robot tried to encapsulate the meaning of the words but remained silent. 'Disco!
  • I cracked a smile, and then a book, and then my head on the tile floor as I slipped on the remains of an open pizza box that poked halfway out from under my bed. "Damn" I shouted.
  • My neighbor below me pounded on his ceiling yelling at me to shut up, which knocked a speaker off the wall that fell on my foot. "Damn" I shouted again. My neighbor pounded harder
  • until my whole flat vibrated. "Right, that's it." I thought, "I'm gonna take that pesky neighbor from the flat below out." I called to my flat mate "Fetch me my
  • Armeshalt slug.I will need it to dig down to his pesky house than to knock on his metal door!"I told him.When I riched down,he was partying with lots of beautiful women.I shot a...
  • mockingbird many years ago when I was but a wee lad, so I knew what was happening to me now was karma. That was the only explanation. He was surrounded by gorgeous women while I
  • was facin' a jury who din't believe me. If I was gonna hang, Boo was goin' down wid me. We shouldna have trusted Atticus. We shouldna have trusted nobuddy.


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