I think I'll go for a walk outside now.

I think I'll go for a walk outside now. The summer sun's calling my name.
I feel it now. The start of Spring. My boyfriend Ralph is a butcher. He's a nice fellow, but a commitment phobe. For 7 years he's fobbed off my desire for a wedding with gift meat.
Two of the seven years, "gift meat" had been a euphemism for the obvious. This year, I told him that I would like a break from being pressured to have sex for a year; then wore
a sexy little number that I bought from chastitybelts.com. It was my favorite shade of copper, studded with rubies and spikes lest anyone get the wrong idea. My present to myself.
It was one of those really secure ones. Not the kind with a lock. The kind that had to be welded onto you. I took it down to the metal shop and was ravaged by Magnuson. He was
shocked that I had the mundane task of delivering the only remaining and mildly titillating,
Knock Knock Joke! This type of joke was fast becoming extinct, due to the Internet, some how reading a Knock Knock Joke just wasn't as funny as hearing one and signing for the deaf
for a lame stand-up comedian like Barney at "Tommy's Deaf Dumb & Blind Bar" made him finally decide to quit his job. He decided to have one last laugh at Barney's expense and
make a sextape with Baby Bop and send it it Barney on his birthday. B.J. was such a rascal, always too busy flying planes and shagging dinosaurs to eat his fruits and vegetables.
That was, until the whole Barney scandal was blown wide open by none other than Detective James Manatee. "Looks like this case is...extinct"

Started: 2011-01-03 17:46:48
Finished: 2011-06-25 17:45:49

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