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There was an eye in his breakfast cereal,

  • There was an eye in his breakfast cereal, floating there in a 2% milk bath, staring up at him. No sign of an optic nerve or even any other gore - just a perfect eye with a green
  • martian standing on the eye ball, paddling across the giant white
  • sea of assorted fluids, paddling with a paddle made of 100% Martian steel to support local planetary business back home. The little green man looked down at his eyeball-raft and
  • thought of home. He wished he hadn't because it made him think of Hilda. The sea of assorted fluids began to broil and his eyeball-raft began to pitch and yarn. The Martian noticed
  • a curious swelling in his nether regions but discounted it as likely gravital undertow. Then, shockingly, suddenly, a geyser of Martian
  • *BEEEP* Color bars crossed the screen along with "technical difficulties." no-that was live tv gone wrong. The FCC is going to have their hands full with that sexually i
  • nadquate Radio-Unfriendly FCC Dodger, pirate radio doofus taking to the airwaves again with his anti-government, hippydippy alternative rawk and roll music that the kids all love
  • . Grandpa finished his rant and immediately nodded off. Grandma removed his sagging dentures & dabbed away the spittle tenderly. He was just as square as the day they met in 1969
  • that one summer that had been immortalized in a song by Bryan Adams. Grandpa reflected on the state of his aging, destroyed testicles. Years of injecting marijuanas into his penis
  • had depreciated the value of his family jewels, but despite that he was loaded; he was a grandpa, after all, even if he couldn't, for the life of him, recall any children.

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