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It was a crushing defeat. The heat wave had

  • It was a crushing defeat. The heat wave had destroyed Mr. Okley's pumpkin patch only days before the town's annual Veggie Might competition. His shriveled produce was too weak for
  • baking even, not fit for canning, likely a waste of compost space. Mr Okley threw the sorry pumpkins in a corner of the yard and forgot about them. About 6 months later he happened
  • upon a little boy clutching a blanket near his compost heap. "Get out of here you little brat!" But the blanket boy said, "Oh no sire, I've come to see the Great Pumpkin."
  • The man was utterly confused. The Great Pumpkin had been destroyed during the Great Pig War. Who had told this young boy that it still existed?
  • His father did! And everybody new that...
  • Her father was always coming up with new and fabulous inventions. She would tiptoe down the basement stairs watching the blue flashes strobe shadows on the walls. "I've done i1!"
  • But it was 0ne eureka t00 many. His quest to convert texting into real speech so he could communicate w1th his teenage daughter was 0ut uv Ctrl. "What hav u done Daddy? :-S"
  • OMG daddy w1th my attempteds uicide i wantd to sent an SOS *not* SMS x_X –– sory hon mustuv been the autocorretc T__T –– ihate u daddy turn 0ff ur text2speech2text inventon t(>_<t)
  • "Jesus christ". I tried my best to read the pleading text message I'd found on victim's cellphone but I couldn't make anything out other than "it hurts" repeated some fifty times
  • . I pondered how they could've found the time to type that out while they were OBVIOUSLY bein' murdered. I decided to cease my investigation and go home to eat some warm spaghetti.
Started
2012-06-22 01:33:53
Finished
2015-05-24 22:00:37

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