I told everybody and their sister that I

  • I told everybody and their sister that I was going to have a yard sale today. Instead, I am here folding stories. I guess I could fold stories and have a yard sale. Nah, I can do
  • Nothing. Oh good, what is life!? How can we breathe!? Are these even my real feet? Trippy stuff when you let yourself sink down into it. Lucky for me I have a plan. I always say to
  • day is the day I'm going to come clean, but then some friend stops by with his bag of sweets, and there goes my very best intentions out the window. Speaking of which, what is that
  • awful smell?The air lingers of something rotten.An unfamiliar smell
  • Like moldy toadstools in your long unscrubbed sink. The odor was causing a psychedelic trip where the room became a mish mash of
  • flying pots and pans, rotating teacups, and the ultraviolet roast beef leftovers from last night's dinner. No. NO! This isn't real! My mind screamed as I looked down at my dishpan
  • hands. They looked like hideous claws. I was ugly! I decided to kill myself by leaping off the rotating teacup ride at Disneyland. That would show them. At least I would be famous
  • . But my high school nemesis, Donna Gluckstein, beat me to it! Her face was all over the news as the girl who threw herself under a cartoon teacup, crushing her to death. "Damn," I
  • Thought as I read the obituary in the newspaper. The death was called accidental. Even my mum knew the Elvis Costello classic, "Accidents Will Happen", sung at the funeral. Strange
  • people who I never knew existed showed up graveside and offered their condolences. It was painfully moving and I know I will never forget my poor accident prone friend.


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