40

It was a bright spring morning. I headed

  • It was a bright spring morning. I headed off to school as usual, but I couldn't stop thinking that something was different about this day. I started to
  • be suspicious in first period. Listening to the convo, the topic was generic, their words were too, even their delivery. It was a new day, but it had all been done before. An eerie
  • lake, Michigan woman entered the class room and sat down next to them. "I'm from a Great Lake." She said. Winked. Then burst into flames. This indeed was a strange, weird
  • way to teach the dangers of phoenixhood. "But I still want to be a phoenix," said Billy. "She'll rise from the ashes, right?" The teacher replied, "Sometimes." The pile of lady ash
  • was put into an urn on the shelf with all the other phoenixes who had never risen again. But Billy still wanted to be a magical bird. "I'll be a Roc then!" he shouted. "Your wish
  • will be granted... after this word from our sponsors!" The genie displayed a large flashing sign telling Billy to install a virus scanner on his crystal ball. "Make me a Roc NOW!"
  • The bartender was called and made a ROC on the spot. This was no ordinary bartender. He had an encyclopaedic knowledge of liqueurs.
  • Not only could he instantly concoct any cocktail you could demand without consulting a book, he could also quote everything he had ever read, which was mostly drink recipes.
  • Then came the day that a girl that looked like she might moonlight as a babysitter asked him for a River Lethe and he choked. He remembered the absinthe but not the pickle juice.
  • She took a big sip & sprayed it in his face. "No pickle juice! I like it!" "So why'd you spray it in my face?" "I do that when I like a drink." "Oh… wanna baby-sit for me?" "Nope."

11 Comments

  1. LordVacuity Apr 07 2017 @ 21:56

    I am thinking somebody reminiscent of Elizabeth Shue for the babysitter and Billy Zane as Billy.

  2. LordVacuity Apr 07 2017 @ 21:58

    a good 5 years to emerge.

  3. Gibber Apr 07 2017 @ 23:01

    Jack Black would play the bartender who would be named, "Sue... yah, just like the song."

  4. LordVacuity Apr 07 2017 @ 23:52

    Sometimes babysitting isn't babysitting.

  5. LordVacuity Apr 08 2017 @ 01:42

    Couldn't he be hip and spell it Sioux?

  6. Gibber Apr 08 2017 @ 04:18

    Or Japanese and spell it ス, short for 鈴鹿.

  7. SlimWhitman Apr 08 2017 @ 09:44

    I pleides for elaboration on this ス person.

  8. Woab Apr 08 2017 @ 10:45

    I'd like to see Catherine O'Hara as the eerie phoenix woman.

  9. Gibber Apr 08 2017 @ 13:28

    鈴鹿はサイボーグのテクノロジーで怪物ハンターとバーテンダーに変身しました。

  10. Gibber Apr 08 2017 @ 13:37

    or no - like this: 鈴鹿はサイボーグ技術でモンスターハンターとバーテンダーに変身しました。

  11. Gibber Apr 08 2017 @ 14:25

    http://foldingstory.com/wz9ou/ Should be "スー" to make it a long "u"

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