The bushes ruffled in the darkness as I walked

The bushes ruffled in the darkness as I walked through the swamp. I could not see it's face, but just the silhouette of a massive being who had a donkey beside him.

I heard whispering "shrek is love, shrek in lyfe".

"Donkey! Get out of my bedroom you ass!" And instead of Donkey out came Pinocchio with a red thong on. I threw up as I tried to avert my eyes. Shrek laughed in the background he

helped build. "Whatever you do, don't tell any lies, Pinocchio!" Shrek shrieked with laughter. It was clear that Pinocchio wanted a no strings attached type of relationship, but I

was into bondage in those days, so I told Wood Boy to take a hike. Shrek was more my speed, what with his little tight nubbly vest and hosiery, but he didn't even know I was alive.

A psychopath jumped through the window and killed everyone.

Except Jamis. Jamis was hiding under the bed when the insane man broke the window and jumped through, so he was the only one left alive. Jamis wanted revenge more than anything, so

when he broke out of the mental institution, he gathered the jumper's belongings left behind and donated them at a nearby Goodwill store. Jamis kept for himself a brand new

Outfit with hunting pants and matching jacket along with hobnail boots. Jamis became an avid hunter and fed his family for the rest of his life, using these innate talents. His son

His son said 'oops'