I nervously boarded the cargo elevator, my
- I nervously boarded the cargo elevator, my enigmatic guide sliding the door shut and flipping the switch. We began to descend deep into the earth. I was nervous, but I needed to kn
- ow why my toilet was on the fritz. So, just like Jules Verne, I had to embark toward the center of the earth. My guide and I both held out plungers at the ready, as the elevator sh
- aft ceremony began, I reflected on how this elevator religion started and forgot about my toilet. I belong to the Unitarian Church of Die Hard. This faith
- has seen me through many action filled trials and tribulations. As it written in the 1st Gospel of John McClane: "Verily, I will rain down upon your car of patrol one evildoer, so
- heinous you will desire not to place thine hand atop this evildoer's cranium whence putteth-ing him in the car of patrol." The Gospel of John McClane continued, "Behold, my revenge
- , served shakeneth, not stirred. Allowed thine movie references to become jumbled. I'll haveth what this wench has havethed. You hadeth me at good morrow. Showeth me the coinage!"
- "Soylent Green art people!", ""Here's looking at thou, kid.", "Art thou talking to me?""E.T. make thou use of a futuristic instrument to contact home." The Renaissance Fair stopped
- tolerating people who broke the immersive experience. Hands were chopped off and phones were smashed. Modern mouths were muffled with iron. The Renaissance Faire hoped to provide
- An alternative to Lollapalooza, where the audience showed off their Russian jerseys and draped themselves in Mexican flags. They got so drunk that they were kicked out of the bars
- & ended up on the streets.John played a set of emptied tequila bottles & Carl covered "Welcome to Tijuana".Their sombrero contained 32 pesos after an hour. ¡Caramba Lollapaloocita!
- Started
- 2014-11-04 18:04:44
- Finished
- 2017-09-02 09:20:58
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