Scruntchnugget, Jacob Nealy's pothead cat

Scruntchnugget, Jacob Nealy's pothead cat was central part of his plan to break out of the Big Bone Lick Correctional Facility. Scrunchnugget was supposed to hide in Santas

colon. Those are the instructions that he had received from his handler, Richard Gere. Gere thought his title should be wrangler. Wrangling cats to be more specific. Scruntchnugget

, being a pothead cat, fancied himself a rebel (as most cats do) and refused to be 'handled' by Richard Gere. "Handle that!", Scruntchnugget hissed as he clawed Gere's face.

Using his various ninja cat skills, Scruntchnugget leapt from the nearest window to avoid pursuit. This attempt was hindered a tad because he was high, but no matter

Scrunchnugget, ninja cat, clawed onto the sill of the 4th floor window and yowled. "Tum-tums? What are you doing out there? Come inside." The window slammed behind on his pursuers.

It would've ended well had Tum-tums' tail not got caught under the closing sill. He screeched loudly but his feline tail stayed out, throbbing & vulnerable.Butch raised his cleaver

to the heavens & beseeched the gods for the courage to amputate Tum-tums' tail. But the gods had forsaken Butch, and he trembled with cowardice and self loathing. But Tum-tums had

a wondrous ability - he could regenerate lost limbs and so of course he grew another tail. The gods would not like it, but that was too bad. Butch yelped and leapt toward Tum-Tums

On the feast of Stephen. Bungalow Bill was a good Cook. His onion soup honoured his mum, The Onion Queen.

Lifting the soup high with one hand, Bill tossed shallots into the crowd as was customary. The Onion Queen smiled and the crowd cheered - the harvest would be plentiful this year.