36

I slowly floated above my corpse towards

  • I slowly floated above my corpse towards the bright light. Was I prepared? Did I pray enough? I lone figure coalesced before me. "WELCOME TO VALHALLA! HERE'S YOUR AXE!"
  • I go hard in da paint
  • ". Translation: "I am a painter, and I enjoy my occupation very much."
  • I like painting, and do enjoy that it is my occupation but I've given up my dreams of owning a house on the shore. I've resigned to a life of ramen noodles and thrift store clothes
  • , but life is mostly good. I live in a little apartment at the edge of the village. There's a park nearby where you can sometimes spot me strolling in my paint-spattered clothing.
  • you might think I was in a paintball war, or that I got caught in a pigment hurricane and you wouldn't be half off the mark. Near the Village, there's a chaotic color attractor
  • device built by Doctor Uptonogood. It drew in all the stray paintballs from arenas all over the world, as well as any art supplies left out in the open. Me and everyone else nearby
  • cowered as the art supplies flew over our heads. Then we heard the voice of Dr. Uptonogood booming through loadspeakers. "I shall now make the most diabolical painting that the
  • world has ever seen! Greater than the coloring book art of Donald Trump. The crowd groaned. Then, silence. But it was too late, Dr. Up-to-no-good had opened the gate to miser
  • y and there was no turning back now. Then, as if sent by God, Dolly Parton beamed down from the sky, strumming her guitar, singing Jolene. And they all lived happily ever after!
Started
2015-04-27 10:02:54
Finished
2019-02-14 20:52:08

0 Comments

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!