"Hammer, if I don't begin and end every sentence

"Hammer, if I don't begin and end every sentence with the word hammer, the device attached to my heart will explode hammer" said Bobby Skids, telemarketer. With a deep breath, he
began to tell the hammering tale of how this predicament came about. "Hammer, it all started with that European wench I discovered face-first in a pool of slug refuse, hammer..."
The hammer lay on the table, inanimate and full of hatred. "Please hammer, don't hurt 'em!" cried the children, terrified that the storyteller really did have the magic ability to
animate the tools of man. The storyteller turned to them with a wicked grin, "But children, there is a force even more powerful than our humble King Hammer here. Even he fears the
radical moves of the Dark Lord Ice T."
"Nobody can defeat the Dark Lord!" the bus driver exclaimed. "Except maybe..."
the dwarf on the 33rd street, but he's reluctant to do it without any special payment."
I immediately called my attorney-at-law Bob Loblaw to see if we could force the dwarf to do it with standard payment. Bob was adamant that the existing bylaws of the contract held
nothing interesting. He invited me over to play mini golf, but I couldn't take him up on his offer - me and the dwarf were hurdling through space-time on our way to
the Martian Olympics. Eldwar the dwarf was competing in the high jump, ironically enough. The gravity isn't as strong there, you see, and, well, we must be off. Tally ho!

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