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Jimmy was about to chop a chicken when he

  • Jimmy was about to chop a chicken when he realized he was wearing a white shirt. Not wanting to ruin it, he quickly donned his Darth Vader costume from last Halloween.Ms.Jones saw
  • Darth flogging his pollo with a light saber and became irate. "Jimmy! Your ruining our Halloween piñata stuffing!" Ms. Jones had high hopes for the childrens halloween party, but
  • Jimmy's light saber-swinging led to the piñata's beheading. Now its insides were spilling out grotesquely, scaring the other children, and promising them nightmares for a week.
  • Most of the nightmares were boring, but there was one nightmare that was insidiously evil. A little 8 year old girl had it.
  • The little girl's nightmare involved a realistic, carefully plotted murder.
  • The girl told her mom about the dream at breakfast. "I rolled the corpse in plastic and dumped it a near-by landfill." Her mom pointed a fork. "No more Encyclopedia Brown for you."
  • "No more Encyclopedia Brown?" She gasped. "But Mom, I need to read my daily murder mystery! How else am I going to keep my mind sharp!"
  • "Play scrabble or mind bogglers, you selfish cow! I gave birth to you, 200 hours I was in labor, and this is how you repay me! Encyclopedias, murder mystery books! I wish you had
  • a library card, for God's sake, and Twister! Go upstairs & bring down the Rock-em-Sock-em Robots. We'll settle this right NOW!" Her heavy bosom heaved. My mother. She disgusted me.
  • But my father, he delighted me. For he was the master of the Rock-em-Sock-em Robots. He was in fact Roboticus Spartacus the heir to the Rock-em-Sock-em throne.
Started
2013-11-02 20:28:40
Finished
2016-01-20 00:58:14

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