65

It started like any other day, up at 5:00am,

  • It started like any other day, up at 5:00am, 20 minute work out and breakfast. As I finished my coffee everything changed. How did she get in I asked myself, steeling myself for
  • Hispanic recruits that were due here any minute I ate a tube of toothpaste and chugged a gallon of orange juice and then
  • prepared my typewriter for some abuse by slathering it with a special greasy concoction i had created in my basement laboratory. binoculars at the ready, I scanned the horizon
  • for the touchdown of the spamwow ship. There was a break in the darkening clouds and the spamwow ship appeared whirling discolights and foghorn effects intact.
  • "That sure was a close one, Smitty. I thought for sure the spamwow ship was going to bite it! Now, when do the pork roll whores get here?" Smitty eyed me with his good eye, swigged
  • his chocolate chip juice. "You'll get your whores when the work's done," he growled. "And don't start the 8 to 12 watch without Sweaty Ron." I knew Sweaty Ron wouldn't
  • wear antiperspirant today - he never wore any on days ending in "day". Sweaty Ron approached in his sleeveless shirt. "SpeedStick Man, help!" I cried. Suddenly, the sky parted and
  • Beyonce appeared. "To the left, to the left." Sweaty Ron began to protest, "But I just showered and-" Beyonce interrupted just in time "But could you walk & talk at the same time?"
  • Ron kept silent and wondered:'Could I?' He'd once tried to make a peanutbutter and jelly sandwich while watching tv at the same time. It had cost him his index finger. This would
  • end poorly. He took a chew. Then a step. Another chew of gum. Another step. "It's working!" he thought. He chewed and took a step. The bus driver never even saw poor Ron. R.I.P.

0 Comments

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!