Through an unusual & inexplicable sequence

Through an unusual & inexplicable sequence of events, I found myself locked in closet with YoYo Ma. We were both sweltering & our hands were duct-taped together. Neither of us
could remember the answers to the trivia questions at the Seniors Social Club Quiz Night. It became apparent to Yo Yo Ma that we'd been locked in the closet as punishment
for his collaboration with Bobby McFerrin in years past. Suddenly a voice came from above. "Welcome" it said. "You have both squandered your lives. If you want to live, you
must die!" God pressed his huge omnipotent finger into Bobby McFerrin's chest. God's brute force incrementally crushed his chest at 60 beats per minute. Once he was dead, Bobby McF
errin's body continued to make rhythmic sounds as the internal organs released gases and decomposed etc. God forgot that Bobby was mocking him so he brought him back to life just
to keep him out of his mane for a while. Bobby grew infuriated with God ignoring him all the time. He'd have to go bigger to really ruffle The Creator's feathers. He invented the
God Vacuum, which would pull God out of every corner of your life. But instead of getting irate at Bobby, God just laughed and used it to hide out from all the attention-seekers.
Yeah, I guess you could say God and Bobby were pretty tight. Sometimes, when God was chillin in his room, Bobby would smuggle up bits of dinner rolls & cake in case God was hungry.
Yeah...God and Bobby WERE tight...but that's all in the past. It seems that Bobby's dinner rolls & cake were making God fat--and there's nothing worse than a bloated & angry God.
Angry or Hangry, Bobby had enough of Gods attitude. So he casually forsook him, and began perusing the archives of human delusion, for a cooler, possibly sexier God to hang with.

Started: 2013-03-20 23:17:10
Finished: 2019-02-06 10:53:53

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