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The Keebler elves had had enough. The Smurfs

  • The Keebler elves had had enough. The Smurfs mushroom houses stunk to high heaven and were rotting the trunks of their homes, they grabbed tubby off the E.L. fudge line
  • and went to clear all the dead rotting smurf bodies that were causing such a stink. A proper burial would be time and labor intensive, they reasoned, there had to be a quicker
  • way... An infomercial blared: "Do YOU have more dead bodies than your freezer can hold? Well now there's Carcass Carp, the freshly noodled fish that munches the mortified. Call
  • Cholera Ora today for the Carcass Carp that we can deliver in three to five weeks." The commercial was tempting, but that wasn't fast enough delivery for how fast the corpses pile
  • themselves up. At least they were tidy - most corpses would have just laid there and rotted. It was a matter of civic pride to the town of Bileous, OR that not even death could
  • befoul their bucolic community. "Don't just lay there lazybones!" Zombie Sara would start in on the fresh corpses. "Get up and grab yourself a broom, a mop, something." Bileous, OR
  • Jileous, whatever his name was, decided that he would start on his grub. I heard the slurping and the chewing, and I was afraid like a Jewling, under Hitler's rule, I cried like a
  • a boy living in a shanty town in Soweto during apartheid. I wailed like a slave on the auction block. Then Julius said "Want some?" and passed his porridge bowl to me. "Who me?"
  • "We have an old saying where I come from," said Julius. "He who shares his porridge shall never go hungry." I was comforted by his words & his crooked smile. I took the bowl from
  • Julius and scooped a reasonable portion of the portion into my little cup. I passed the bowl of porridge to the next guy, and he's not eating, he's just looking at me.
Started
2011-06-08 22:49:01
Finished
2014-04-23 23:55:50

3 Comments

  1. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Apr 23 2014 @ 23:59

    Oh heck, "portion of the porridge" is what I meant. "Oranges of the caramba" is what I might as well type if I'm going to think one thing and type another!
  2. Avatar

    Zetawilk Apr 24 2014 @ 06:33

    I wonder if that's like Ore-Ida. It just dawned on me. Does Ore-Ida stand for Oregon-Idaho?
  3. Avatar

    49erFaithful Apr 25 2014 @ 12:43

    Lol BlastedHeath. Could have been worse! Yep, GB, Wikiresearch points to yes!

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