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As I gazed over the canyon filled with squid,

  • As I gazed over the canyon filled with squid, I thought about my 12 children and wonder what could come of them. Then I dove in. The millions of squid fought hard but one by one I
  • killed them for the next 10 years since I killed at the rate I counted. I returned home to 12 grown kids and a remarried wife. "Sorry, dear," my wife said, "But if you counted fast
  • you need a new watch". My ex-wife then handed me a gold Rolex watch as a gift. I wondered what I had done to deserve such an expensive gift. The card attached said
  • "Times up!" Then the Rolex exploded in my face. That bitch! I had plenty of time to think about how to retaliate while I was cooped up at the VA recovering. My ex-wife was gonna
  • be surprised when I yelled "Shoryuken!" and uppercutted her with a flying dragon punch. Then I'd do a backbreaker on her and finish her off by tearing out her spine. My colostomy b
  • ag needed to be emptied, so I paused the game. I'll spare you the gruesome details. Anyway, I had just dismembered my girlfriends Mortal combat character when her phantom limbs
  • started caressing me. Heavy petting is great, but when your girlfriend's phantom limbs are doing the heavy petting, it's so sexual that
  • your cock goes as hard as a rock, and before the heavy petting is over, it rips through your trousers.
  • That is last time you will smuggle a rooster through customs. (flag save!) Fighting roosters don't travel well in cargo pants and after picking up the shreds of cloth at security,
  • you'd be lucky to even having your own rooster intact enough to have sacrificed your dignity. Those talons are sharp, is what I'm saying. And security will still grope you.
Started
2012-06-28 02:35:19
Finished
2013-02-18 22:34:03

2 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Zetawilk Feb 19 2013 @ 01:09

    You'd think rushing to compose a snippet of text would naturally make you more prone to typographical and grammatical errors, but I think the internet these days with its social networking and media commercialism is just making me dumber.
  2. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Feb 19 2013 @ 04:55

    FS is good training against that dumbing process.

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