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After the race money exchanged hands. The

  • After the race money exchanged hands. The Tortoise gave the hare 1,000 dollars. Then the Tortoise's buddy collected the money from all the bets
  • placed by Porgy the pig, Charlotte the spider and the Teenage mutant ninja turtles. But then a roaring voice was heard: it was the Lion King claiming the hare had cheated! This cau
  • sed the hare to say ,"I'll atone my crime by cooking the Lion King a feast: turtle soup,roast pig,& crispy spider" The King salivated but Porgy,Charlotte & the ninja turtles suspe
  • cted trouble.The ninja turtles explained they were mutants.The Lion King threw up in his mouth a little.Charlotte said she was an arachnid and had no meat. All eyes turned to Porky
  • "Charlemagne" Puttanesco. "You want some meat? I got your meat right here. But aren't you feasting a little low on the pyramid of self-fulfillment?" Porky trotted out Maslow's "
  • Nutritional Pyramid". Montessorie's "Dead Butter but Dead Quicker" routine flew off the handle. That was when Porky ran into Wiley Coyote. Wiley didn't need tricks to catch HIM.
  • Helena looked at me like I'd just been sick down her dress. "Do you usually spew out shit like that on a first date?" I had to admit, I talked a lot of bullshit when I was nervous
  • . "Look, I'm sorry, Helena. It's just that you...you have a long black hair growing out of your right nostril and I...it..." I sighed, unable to finish. She glared and me & whipped
  • out a pair of tweezers. With one deft pluck Helena transformed into a total babe. She'd been skeaky hot this whole time and I just hadn't picked up on it. She said "How would you
  • like to take a long walk off a short pier?" So I did. I couldn't swim and sank to the bottom of the ocean. A mermaid found me and took me to live in her underwater kingdom.

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