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"Lemurs have biggest testicles of all primates

  • "Lemurs have biggest testicles of all primates in proportion to body mass". Digit threw the newspaper away... He knew Gorilla testicles were the smallest among primates & now this.
  • It was a testicluar overload for Digit. Everywhere he looked he saw something that reminded him. The tea bags he made his tea with, and when he opened his fridge the
  • body was there, motionless, without any sign of life. Digit got afraid, and he realized that he couldn't call the police: they would incriminate him.
  • There was only one thing left to do. Digit lifted the body and, with one swift movement, bit into the leg. He kept biting, tearing and chewing his way through, and soon the corpse
  • was stripped to the bone. Digit sighed and wiped his mouth on the corpse's former shirt. He stood and looked around, wondering if anyone had seen him. Being a self-aware zombie was
  • an upchuck inducing predicament. Thankfully, he hadn't the bowels to produce upchuck. Most of the flesh he'd torn with his teeth ended falling out the open wound in his stomach. He
  • screwed up his face in pain and fell to the floor after realising that being a zombie was not the solution to his problems; finally he needed to turn himself in.
  • His eyes glazed over as he began to stare into the middle distance, slowly coming to this realisation, but what he didn't know was that it might be too late. Another zombie had
  • crawled up into his tent, seizing his leg with a mighty grip while letting out a deep groan. The next thing he knew, a sharp pain bloomed in his ankle. The zombie had buried its
  • treasure all over the island like a squirrel burying nuts; in this case the treasure was human brains. The zombie created a complex treasure map with his blood and the tent canvas.

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