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I walked in and a odd looking blob of blue

  • I walked in and a odd looking blob of blue substance waved at me on top of my newly painted dripping table. I turn and
  • say, "Why hello Papa Smurf!" The bearded blue elderly Smurf leaned against the paint can. "This isn't one of those kind of visit," he eyed me somberly.
  • I assured the elderly Smurf that I was here for no bad reason. We had tea and he talked about his past, but all night, the only thing I could think about was
  • how my beard had tons of little Smurfs crawling in it. I walked forward, towards the edge of the volcano, and started brushing them down into the fiery lava. The screamed as the hi
  • gh temperatures melted all the facepaint, and lo! The tiny smurfs were actually ants with blue painted-on faces. What conspiracy was this?! The heat from the volcano made my beard
  • curl into tiny knots. I tread back from the volcano. "How about if we go the long way round?" I quip. "how about if we don't," the savage pushes me into the fiery chasm and
  • I am once again thankful for my habit of wearing flame retardant footie pajamas. I swirled around in the lava as if it was a mere hot tub. I would surprise that savage who tried to
  • cook me alive. I dipped my corrosion resistant med pacifier in lava & stuck it in the savage's mouth. He gave a greedy suck & -voila- was thrilling his tribe with a sick wild dance
  • which distracted the savages long enough for me to escape their pot of water and hightail it into the jungle. I located my hot air balloon right where I had left it, tethered to a
  • Migrating wildebeest. I jumped in and dropped all of my ballast and cutting the mooring lines. As I rose into the sky beyond their plasma weapons, I thought to how this started.

2 Comments

  1. IceSquad Mar 19 2017 @ 18:32

    What mother leaves her bearded baby in a volcano?

  2. Woab Mar 22 2017 @ 13:20

    Furthermore, why were there so many tiny smurfs in his beard? Had he been eating smurfs? Why didn't grandpa smurf mention this over tea? Love this story.

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