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I'll keep this fart forever!

  • I'll keep this fart forever!
  • In a plastic bag, in a tin can, in a wooden chest, in the closet, in the spare room of our house in the woods. No way this fart will ever escape. Why
  • would it want to,though?After all,it's kept together with the greatest farts of all time:Washington,Einstein,Laurel were among them.We had to protect them from being sniffed before
  • their prime. Why it's a unholy crime to sniff these things before they're really ripe, you know the fermented nose-burning kind of bubbly ripeness. So we took Washington, Laurel an
  • d Jamie to go sniff the vegetables when they were perfectly ripe, so they would appreciate the art of veggie sniffing.
  • Veggie sniffing was a dying art and how great is that? Jamie never saw the point. Not even when I drove it through his eye. "I know it is a voodoo that you do too." Respiquieu took
  • a good sniff at the avocado and decided that it would make an apt voodoo doll. So Respiquieu stuck the voodoo avocado with toothpicks and felt the guacamole in his stomach cringe.
  • Even Respiquieu was not sure why he made a voodoo doll out of an avocado to torture the nasty guac he ate earlier. His gay lovers all said being inside him was torture enough. Yet.
  • Respiquieu stuck the silver needle into the avocado, piercing its skin and easily penetrating its soft flesh. He heard a faint cry of pain from the guacamole, smiling with sati
  • sfaction as its last, dying breath was clearly audible. This wasn't a story, but an origin.. Of the Fruit Bowl Killer.

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