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How fast is your heart beating right now?

  • How fast is your heart beating right now?
  • I sneered and tossed another shovelful of loose dirt over him. Tell ME to do another five burpees. Personal trainer my azz. More like dead man.
  • I did a jig on his grave. Teach you to change all the diet rules each year. Eggs are bad for you. No Eggs are good. Never use tropical oils. Only use coconut oil. Why?!
  • Unfortunately, since I was so huge from following all his diet advice, when I danced on his grave I managed to fall right through and into his coffin. All it contained was a note,
  • that said "HAHA! I knew this would happen. Have fun getting out." I stood there in disbelieve, wondering how I was going to get out. I jumped but I wasn't tall enough. I tried to
  • climb, but I had no strength in my arms after last night's chase from the police. I had to think. I kicked, screamed, beat my fists. I was trapped, like a politician's wife.
  • Then I remembered the politician's wife's only card was knowing where the bodies were buried. I knew where the bodies were buried. I just had to dig my way over to one and ... well
  • my trowel just broke. I hate getting dirt under my fingernails, which I have yet to find anyone to relate to about. I forgot why I was digging up the buried bodies. Right, to clear
  • up the rumors that I am into necrophilia I need to stop digging up dead bodies. While that seems like a simple solution, it is a hard habit to break. I wish that people knew I just
  • put one foot in front of the other like everyone else. It's not my fault the dead speak to me. It's not my fault the past refuses to stay in its grave.

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