The older guy Sharona had been seeing was

  • The older guy Sharona had been seeing was turning out to be a possessive creep. All this my, my, my business, and all the talk about getting it up and making his motor run was just

  • exhausting. Sharona was already so tired. Wienerslav had kept Sharona up all night drinking java. His whole body vibrated as he recalled the days when he and slim Jim Similar had

  • similar slim Jim sympathies. They'd chewed the jerky until their tongues felt like a dessicated cow's. Then Sharona in the next beanbag & french kissed him. Wienerslav salivated

  • and the thought of some more beef jerky. Sharona felt a spark from the kiss but Wienerslav did not. No, Weinerslave wanted Sharona to move because he big fat head was blocking the

  • view of the driveway, the driveway that Wienerslave was expecting the Pizza Hut delivery guy to drive up at any second. But Sharona couldn't forget the spark of that kiss so she

  • threw all of her housedresses into a duffel bag and crept out the back door, leaving Wienerslave to pay for his own pizzas forever more. Sharona caught the next bus to Canada.

  • But house dresses proved to be too frail an adornment for the unforgiving winters of Canada. She died, frozen in a solid block of maple syrup in a diner outside of Quebec.

  • Digby's was closed permanently and investigations took three years. Digby was allowed to reopen but no maple syrup was allowed. No substitute was available so lingonberry sauce was

  • thrown against the wall as a protest by a Boysenberry Strain hooligan. This turned out to be the tipping point. Most historians consider this act & the events of the next 2 nights

  • the beginning of the end of the Nancy Reagan "Just say 'No!" to drugs era. Thanks to President Kanye West's signing of the 69th Amendment: Thou Shall Get High By Any Means.



  1. MadWorld Sep 01 2017 @ 00:53

    Shalt. . .which sounds like shout. . .but isn't.

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