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Though short sighted Ornithorhynchusologist,

  • Though short sighted Ornithorhynchusologist, Bill D. Mamon, sensed a rat & ducked into the nearest library cubicle changing into the web-footed costume of Capt. Platypus!

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  • He heard whispers but couldn't make them out so he stuck a snorkel through the stacks. Sure enough, Dr. Mamon/Capt. Platypus overheard Bill Dozer & Ken Crete plotting to wipe out

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  • the hit song "Wipe Out" from every music library in the world. Bill Dozer & Ken Crete hated surf rock. But Dr. Mamon/Capt. Platypus would stop them by

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  • taking them in his old VW van to his beachfront home. Donning a Hawaiian shirt, Mr Platypus forced Bill and Ken to listen to him play surf rock on the ukulele until they agreed to

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  • take off their shirts and play wingmen on his advances towards the other cute platypus sunbathing on the beach. He adjusted his feathers and introduced himself as "Eduardo,

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  • the Duke of--" Before he could finish a crocodile sprung out of the water and ate him. "You just ate Eduardo!" the cute platypus exclaimed. "A croc's gotta eat, honey," he said.

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  • The Duke's family was devastated to find Eduardo was eaten, but they never found the murderer. The police mistakenly looked at the man eating rats in the sewer.

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  • The man seemed unconcerned. "Don't worry about it, people make mistakes". he said as he chewed on a big rat and sat back higher in the sewer. The police crossed him off as a suspec

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  • -t because they figured anyone who ate rats couldn't be all bad. "The police have gotten so lax these days," complained Bertha from inside her apartment with the door torn off.

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  • Outside, the first summer showers could be heard.

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