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The third Emperor decided to eat an apple

  • The third Emperor decided to eat an apple pie. But inside the pie was a layered octopus. He took a bite out of it, and the octopus came out and ate the Emperor. Then the octopus
  • stood over the Emperor's dead body and started to
  • masturbate.
  • That was an idea that I could really get a grip on. Between long pulls, I nursed my lager. I liked a little ambiance and scented oils and a black and tan smacked of a good time.
  • And then the lager turned to blood. And I wasn't in a pub but in a cave. And there were others around me drinking blood too. They had fangs and pointed ears and I looked at my hand
  • and saw a pentagram scratched in blood. OMG! I realised I had somehow ended up in a parallel universe where bad spelling is punishable by death-by-drainage, and I was on the list
  • of designated drainers. Crap I was squeamish about blood, had been all my life. Now I would have to drain the blood of bad spellers, try not to up-chuck and hope my spealing pased.
  • Unfortunately, the spelling virus had spread. It was infecting my brian. I tired two get sum help but it waz too latte. I was domed.
  • Qickly, i oppened up MS Werd. The sergeuns wit teh help of teh new neral connnectors attached the spell checker directly into my head. It wasn't a perfect solution, butt I was
  • glad eye died bee cuz my penis member my hulk hens hands whirr growling growning growing raped rapist fast and eye cudgeled couldn't tape whiff with them.

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