69

I knocked. Knock tap tap tap knock. "Password?"

  • I knocked. Knock tap tap tap knock. "Password?" I said "Up yours." The door opened and I stepped into the safehouse. A DEA agent was dead in the corner. 15 kilos of coke were piled
  • In the fireplace. And that's a lot of aluminum cans - 15 kilos of coke, you do the math. I was never a good caffeine runner, I always get my 7up and Sprites confused, Coke zero?
  • And don't even get me started on explaining Mountain Dew. Yes, Michelle Obama's ban on carbonated beverages had everyone on edge. I began covert negotiations with PepsiCo
  • to ensure Pepsi became the number one breakfast beverage in the country but the People Against Lard Arses (PALA) protested. I received threats to bomb my
  • Pepsi propaganda movies, but the Propaganda Movie Society (PMS) offered their protection by attending every viewing. Now Pepsi was sure to create lardy arses, and Coke couldn't do
  • nate any money for diabetes. The Pepsi Propaganda team was losing ground. They needed a fresh take to catch up with Coke. Pepsi enlisted Deepak Chopra
  • To promote the lack of aspartame in their product. Older customers were complaining about the flavour of the new product. Deepak Chopra insisted on no artificial flavours in the
  • line of vegetable-flavoured ice creams. They decided to take the risk that would only pay off if their customer base didn't have the palates of children.
  • As it turned out, the veggie ice cream was a success. Some the the most popular flavors included Carrots 'N' Cream, Radish The Thought Ripple, Spinach Supreme, Pea Soup Surprise,
  • Broccoli Road, Potato Parfait and Kale Yeah!

0 Comments

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!