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I'm so lazy at work that I don't even bother

  • I'm so lazy at work that I don't even bother to get up to pee. Instead, I
  • keep a Mason jar under my desk. I'll never forget the time my boss asked for a sip of “apple juice.” I tried to stop him
  • instead, I said "Absofuckinglutely" ya *&^%$$. He took a gulp like a ravenous maniac who spent days in
  • Chinatown. They ate like mad men there. It's where he met Ingrid...I met her there too, we shared
  • a fondness for Shanghai dumplings and steamed buns. I never knew if she liked me but we always talked easily about
  • the various sauces she liked: Hot mustard, honey mustard, BBQ, mango habanero sauce. It wasn't until after that party
  • that she realized she could mix them all together to make one huge
  • fruit salad. But she thought better of it and decided to
  • put it under her roommates bed hoping that it would rot and smell. She deserved it after the episode where she
  • forgot to flush after the chili-eating contest. The bathroom was literally a biohazard area for a week. Sweet revenge!
Started
2010-05-13 15:47:45
Finished
2010-05-21 09:42:54

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