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He peaked his nose through the bamboo venetian

  • He peaked his nose through the bamboo venetian blinds. The guy who had been following him waited at the street lamp. He heard a knock and turned. He got the worst nostril splinter.
  • The splinter was right in the crack between his nostril and face. Tears exploded from his eyes. The door opened revealing
  • someone dressed up in a Spiderman costume. Welcome to the world wide web,' he said. I hesitated for about half an hour while he wove a web around me. Gosh, now I was stuck
  • as many sticky hyperlinks held me fast in front of my computer. Then WWW spiderman began to suck the information out of my brain
  • and placed it on Pipileaks, while I sat in frozen horror in front of my computer screen. I tried to concentrate to raise my mental barriers so WWW spiderman could not get to the mo
  • nitor. Meanwhile. Pipileaks had published,UNREDACTED, full details of my snacking habits INCLUDING that incident with the packet of hobnobs which would make Gwyneth Paltrow blanch
  • her panties. There wasn't enough yen in Nagasaki to finance the bidding war that would ensue if Gwyneth's blanched panties hit the open market. I had to plug the Pipileaks dataport
  • with the metallic wrapper of my Fruit Stripes gum to keep the server from overloading. Pretty soon those Japanese businessmen made me very rich. Very rich indeed. I squandered my
  • recourses, my parents, my livelihood for this very moment. The power of my Fruit Stripes gum wrapper will be known to the world, and I will become the new giant of the computer
  • world out performing Tianhe-2 and eating Titan for breakfast. Beware! The age of the Fruit Stripes Gum Wrapper has come.

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