Toby stared at the flamboyant man, who had

  • Toby stared at the flamboyant man, who had sparkles falling out of his hair with every slight tilt of the head. His tight leather skinnies and short sleeved button up made Toby wan
  • t to grab him by his arms & shake the sparkles right out of him. But the last time he shook a fairy, he was turned into a toad for a fortnight. To this day he still tasted flies wh
  • en he stuck out his tongue. Ugh. So, as you can tell, that didn't end well for him. Last time I hears, he was being tormented on some deep, obscure hellish demiplane by an imp in a
  • "Make America Great Again" hat. Serves him right. Well, all this talk has made me hungry. Why don't the rest of us who ate still alive go on down to the Waffle House? I hear they
  • actually cleaned the waffle irons and made fresh coffee-- the first time in twelve years. And it's a great place for people who have no taste buds to meet up with stupid people
  • to watch from the corner of your eye. All the while pretending to write something serious in your Moleskine notebook. On a counter above the espresso machine is a glass merkhaba
  • that we're to believe one of their baristas collected in their travels. In the corner behind the counter there was a rainstick that looked like it had been grown on that spot. Then
  • the concierge arrives to check our bags and ask us, "Have you ever been so based you were woke?" We had to alarm her that she had it the other way around, but we tipped anyhow.
  • He chose to take the tip and umbrage at the offer. Then he turned his heels away from us and stormed off to the bank. “Golly G, Loretta. How small of a tip did you give him?”
  • “I gave him a GREAT tip,” she said. “I wrote on a piece of paper ‘Bet on Andy’s Dance to win in the 5th race at Aqueduct.’” But it was a bum steer: Andy’s Dance came in dead last.


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