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"What of the Toad?" he asked. A reasonable

  • "What of the Toad?" he asked. A reasonable question considering the situation he found himself in: a green gloppy soup decorated with lillypads filled the bath and
  • there was not a toad to be seen, really?! Why'd he even bother to pay good money for the latest Swamp Bath(TM) if there wasn't a toad in it?
  • The thing was, though, he wanted the toad feature on his Swamp Bath. Yeah, that's right...the Super Deluxe Model 280WART with extra jets & color-changing LEDs. He found one on ebay
  • but the 280WART didn't have a stink feature, and that's something true swamp lovers can never go without. So, the man resigned himself to his fate; he would have to seek out
  • a special dwarf with a magic nose in order to get a type of transportation that would really stink something awful. A true lover of a swamp needs to travel in style
  • in a solid gold airboat! I went to work for Peter Belgoody to raise funds for my airboat. He had me disposing of "packages" in the swamp. That is when the Toxic Avenger showed up
  • to give a presentation on naturopathic birthing techniques. "If you warm a dilute gelatin solution to 98F, you can ease the transition from womb to world, resulting in a healthier
  • baby." He looked down at his feet, what could he possibly know about childbirth? When he answered the ad for a "presentation speaker" to make a few extra $ he didn't know Madam
  • Twonky, a widow, could teach him all there was to teach about childbirth. All of it. "Are you a gynecologist or something?" he asked. "Oh no," Twonky replied. "Just a hobbyist."
  • He tensed up in horror. "Did you say you're a terrorist?" He stopped talking right there and then, but it was too late. Twonky was offended by the question. You know the rest.
Started
2013-09-19 08:42:47
Finished
2015-01-12 18:07:08

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Jan 13 2015 @ 18:15

    I liked AugustWest's "What of the toad" line so much, I started this story in homage. The Story where it appeared: http://foldingstory.com/izrn6/

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