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The drone rose from the ground with zero

  • The drone rose from the ground with zero intent. Somewhere, thousands of miles away, a sleepy contractor was pulling back on a joystick. Normally he was reliable, but the divorce
  • had led to daily drinking, and sleepless nights. He tried to stay focused, but weeks without real rest had made him more and more unreliable at the controls. The drone was hovering
  • over a WalMart parking lot in Everett, WA. To him it looked like Afganistan. That's when he saw Osama. Holy crap, he was carrying a vacuum cleaner. He didn't wait for orders, he
  • jumped at him like a tiger jumps on its prey, tossed the vacuum cleaner aside, and shoved his finger up Osama's
  • gun like he was f-ing Bugs Bunny on Yosemite Sam's ass. "Take that, poo-poo head!", for after all, he was only 4 years old. "And that's why we never let terrorists
  • into our treehouse. This is for the cool, white, Christian, brotherhood of non-poopy heads." With that, he shoved him off the 4 foot square platform to the waiting ground below.
  • It was kind of a rough landing on his face, but his injury wasn't severe and he could still talk. "You're a jerk," he called up to the fundie on the mic, his arms at his sides.
  • The fundie sneered at him. "I may be a jerk, but I'm a Jerk for Jesus, and without jerks like us, you'll all burn in Hell for eternity!" Dusting himself off, he stood back up
  • and I sprinkled him with glitter. That's all I had -- that and an unexpected will to forgive. Such muscular contortions of disdain we tiny beings exert! The Creator of the Cosmos
  • frowned, shook his head and wiped the Universal slate clean. He sighed. And then there was light ... again.
Started
2010-12-31 11:14:40
Finished
2012-09-26 18:00:55

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Zetawilk Sep 26 2012 @ 20:42

    You never know if you're narrating Osama bin Ladin or Gertrude Stein until you do it.

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