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I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables. I mean

  • I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables. I mean A LOT. Like a literal crap-ton. Do you even know how much that is? That's enough to distend an ox stomach three levels past engorgement
  • "I know just what you mean," said Lyle, but I paid him no mind. I was craving a new fruit/veg treat upon which to gorge my gluttonous needs: A kiwi-stuffed-pear-stuffed pomegranate
  • and carrot-stuffed banana-stuffed cantaloupe-stuffed aubergine-stuffed butternut squash-stuffed watermelon-stuffed pumpkin. Little did Lyle know my culinary creation would soon be
  • absorbed into the overreaching corrupt web of Emeril's chef dynasty. Lyle watched as by crock pot bbq cheesecake borscht was pimped and reproduced by Emeril to satisfy his
  • super sex appeal. He wore Chef Emeril's culinary creation to the presidential inauguration speech. It was a huge success and he was nearly naked by the end of the evening.
  • Nearly, of course, is almost entirely except for the "Bam!" handkerchief adorning his unmentionables that he had "borrowed" from Emeril early in the day. He thought it was a litt
  • le under the bottom. Being his own man was hard work and if he couldn't come up with his own catchphrase, well, a man could steal one. So he did. "Bam!" adorned all his unmentionab
  • -les, which was redundant on a bottom that often said "Bam!" without having to spell it out. (I don't make fart jokes, I just fold them.) The guys in the locker room laughed at his
  • little eruption & snapped his ass with their towels, exacerbating the problem further. This...this was NOT funny & yet every guy in the locker room was dying laughing. Soon, Marsha
  • walked in, dragging a ribbon of TP on her heel. The guys laughed until one had to make a doo-doo, only to learn that the TP on Marsha’s heel was all that was left. Panic ensued.
Started
2013-08-27 17:37:19
Finished
2019-05-14 21:24:38

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Woab May 15 2019 @ 15:50

    Ah Tarotguy, how I do love to see jocks fall. Must've been all those times I had doo-doo kicked in my face at the beach. Serves 'em right.

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