I don't care what He says. When the computer

  • I don't care what He says. When the computer voice is singing in Daft Punk's "Up All Night," it sounds like it's singing, "we'll rub a Mexican lucky."
  • I played it for Him again, but it's like God isn't listening. "Daft Punk has tapped into the cosmic computers that run reality, man-spawn," God said. "Now excuse me while I kiss th
  • e sky!" Then Daft Punk was like, "Whaaaaaat?" And God gave them a high five and said, "Jimi Hendrix is the man." Then God pulled up a celestial chair and said, "Boys, I need to
  • Make sure the right man is beheaded." It happened that Queen of Scots was beheaded and Bloody Mary died prematurely. But this was 2025. September was not yet over, the old king was
  • ready to rumble. It turned out the Queen's coaxing for him to find a hobby had backfired. His latest extracurricular foray into Mexican wrestling left him hardened, un-beheadable
  • wry, and worst of all, cynical. Once an optimist, he now stared at his whiskery face in the mirror each morning wondering what the hell life was all about. The Queen was worried
  • and shaved the King's beard off while he slept. The next morning he was shocked to see his bald chin in the mirror, but his mood had lightened. Now he could hold his head high and
  • chuck it across the room. The King had this weird talent of separating his head from his body, and would often host games of basketball in the throne room. His beardless head
  • always found the hoop but the king's big nose always got him tangled in the net. He hated it just as much as he loved finding the hoop, so he kept doing it. The last time his nose
  • got tangled,it was ripped right off."Shhrraaack!"The Sound of flesh tearing accompanied the kings muddled cries of pain.Everybody cheered,saying never had a Show been this charming


  1. Woab Feb 08 2017 @ 16:53

    This story brings up the question "How can you behead someone who has a detachable head?" It also brings up other things. Like lunch! ...and boy has now joined the Inclusive Club of the Unfinished Last Line. (Hearty handshakes all around.)

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